Beary Strange

Somewhere deep in Bear Country
Lives the Berenstain Bear family
They're kind of furry around the torso
They're a lot like people, only more so

The bear fact is that
They're just like you and me
The only difference
Is they live in a tree

This is an excerpt from the theme of the public television show "The Berenstain Bears." Now, I absolutely love the Berenstain Bears. I read the books as a child, and now Dennis and I watch the television show at work during our lunch break everyday. While I do love this show, I cannot help but note the falsehoods in the song. I know it's a children's show, but honestly, "They're a lot like people, only more so"??? "They're just like you and me, the only difference is they live in a tree"????? What do these statements even mean?? Who wrote this theme song? How was it seriously approved and used for the show? I'm all for using your imagination (I do everyday), but I just cannot understand how something could be more human than a human. Dennis and I just laugh and shake our heads everyday....crazy Berenstain Bears.

My name's not Alexander, but...

"Are you mad?"
"Yes!"
"Why are you mad?"
"Because I feel like it, okay?"
I wanted to laugh so bad when I said that, but something deep inside me forced me to scowl and grumble. Why was I acting like such a baby? Why was I acting like such a brat? The answer truly was that I just felt like being angry. I woke up too early with too little sleep, a tire on my bike was flat (and it had been going flat a lot recently), I had to ride Steven's bike to work, I didn't WANT to ride Steven's bike to work, I didn't have a rack on his bike on which to secure my purse, so it kept hitting me in the leg and falling off my shoulder, the bike kept switching gears on me when I didn't want it to....I was just mean. All of that stuff wasn't a big deal, but I forced myself to make it a big deal. I truly did want to laugh and shrug everything off, but my pride wouldn't let me. As my favorite childhood book would have proclaimed:

"It was a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day."

...But it actually wasn't all that terrible. It wasn't even all that horrible. After work, I walked out into the sunshine to find Chaz had ridden my bike to work and he had bought me a new tire. How I am spoiled. I am thankful for his grace and forgiveness when I treat him badly. Then, I had some much needed girl time with Kim last night. Shopping and Auntie Anne's pretzels (only for $1 because the high schooler working thought Kim was cute). What could be better?

"I guess everyone has bad days...even in Australia."

I Love My Bicycle...

I love the white paint, green and yellow John Deere written on the side, with green and yellow stripes. I love the white fenders accenting the skinny tires. I love the old, huge reflectors on the back and front. I love the large, worn leather seat that is hard as anything, but strangely comfortable. I love the girl-style of the bike (so I can wear skirts while riding...and of course I do!). I love the large handlebars that allow me to sit straight as I ride. I love the road-bike-like gear shift. I love the sweet, new brakes the Ames Bike Club oh-so-kindly put on my bike. I love the sweet, old-fashioned odometer/spedometer on the handlebars, I love the bike bar on the back which allows me to carry packages and purses without holding them. I love the amazing, loud, ringy-rusty bell on the right handlebar. I love the way the fenders squeak and the bike clicks as I ride it down the streets of Ames. I love the fact that this amazing, sweet, awesome, dream-bike of mine only cost $40!

Mostly, I love that Chaz bought this beloved bike for me because I did not have enough money...I still have to pay him back (I also love that he doesn't charge interest...hehe).

A definition of marriage and weddings

Steve and Chelsi's wedding was yesterday. Widely anticipated by myself, it came and went all too quickly. It was probably the most beautiful wedding I have ever been to. Was it because everything was meticulously planned down to the last iota of a detail? Was it because thousands and thousands of dollars had been spent by all involved? No and no. It was beautiful because it was simple, lovely, and all about the couple's love. It perfectly suited the two getting married.

It was a day-long celebration. At dawn, the couple got baptized together a few yards from where they would later be married. The rest of the day was spent eating, sleeping, and fellowshipping with the couple and others involved in the wedding. It was so nice to actually get to spend some time with the bride and groom. It was a gorgeous day, so exploring and playing games were all options. At six, all of the guests arrived to eat supper. The tables were beautifully decorated with fresh wildflowers the family had picked up earlier. The wildflowers were all from a garden and arranged by the family. At 7:45, it was announced that the wedding ceremony would be held outside. Then, the couple was married under a beautiful canopy decorated with vines, with the ground scattered with colorful rose petals. Chelsi looked absolutely gorgeous in a simple wedding dress her and her sisters had made. It was beautiful! Steve looked handsome in a light brown suit. The bridesmaids looked beautiful as well, in dresses they had all picked out. Brown was the only stipulation. The guys wore suits with brown ties of their choice. The couple served the guests communion, praise songs were sung, and they were announced just as sun was setting. After the ceremony, there was dessert and dancing, toasts and talking. It was delightful.

One of the best parts, however, was the message on love Josh, the pastor, shared. Marriage is often taken too lightly these days. It is often gone into too lightly and broken even easier. Weddings, while beautiful, can be commercial and plastic. Gorgeously planned and perfectly executed, but without feeling. Josh told us that sometimes people even change their vows from "as long as we both shall live" to "as long as we both shall love." However, God ordains marriage as a physical symbol of His relationship with us. The way a husband and wife are to love each other and be committed to each other is the way God feels about us. Josh said, "Isn't it nice to know that when times get rough, God doesn't commit to us only 'as long as we both shall love'?"

It was absolutely refreshing to see these two beloved people come together as one in such a simple and lovely way. They committed to each other to be together for life, and I know they will honor that commitment. They didn't need a fancy wedding to do it, either. They focused on their love as opposed to the decorations and look. And this is what made that wedding the most beautiful one I have ever been to.

cranky worker

Working for the summer has left me exhausted. The work's not hard...it's actually fun. I love the CTLT family. It's just those early mornings that are really cramping my style. Oh well, I suppose I must get used to it for teaching. By 9, I'm cranky and ready for bed. It's 11, I'm gonna head to bed now. I'm getting unbearable to be around, so it must be time to go.

Oh, I went for a run tonight with Chaz. Yes, that's right. I went for a run. I hate running. Loathe it, in fact. I like him.

My Trip Home

mommy and daddy picking me up, driving sleepy, sleeping in, brothers jumping on me, grilling burgers, eating food, baby bunny, skinny Babe, crazy Ozzie, mischevious Leroy, dressing up, wedding, mommy/daughter time, shopping, tv watching, more sleeping, bloody noses, punches, bruises, brother beating, church going, brother teasing, radio singing, eating eating, grandma's jokes, money for Rwanda, apple pie, stories, laughter, "pathetic brushes with greatness," driving home, brother secrets, hugs and kisses, family love, driving back...missing them

Roomies

Kim's my new roommate. It's exciting! It's nice to come home and see her beauty in my living room. It's nice to decorate and girlify our apartment. Amy's slowly moving out, and that is sad, but it is time for my next stage in life. Well, by slowly I mean that she's preparing for marriage at the end of the month. *sigh* another one bites the dust...lucky girl.

I look over the roommates of my past. They've all only lasted a year (with the exception of my family....but that just goes without saying).
First there was Mikala—she was delightful. We were so different, but we got along so well. We watched ABC Family all day long, including many "Prince of Bel-Air" marathons. 8 AM to 12 AM full of Will Smith.
Then there was Allison—Dancing Fridays, "Worst Song Ever" times, singing, cuddle raping, etc. etc. All around good times. I now consider her one of my greatest friends. Our friendship made a large transition over the course of that year, and I am so thankful that we keep in touch and still enjoy each other's company.
This year I transitioned to an apartment and life with Amy—With opposite schedules, it made it hard to see each other. I'm a night owl and a sleeper-inner, while she's an early to bed, and early to riser. We still had good times, however. Chatting it up, girl-style, and preparing for her wedding. It's been an amazing first apartment experience.
And now....Kimberly—Who knows how long we'll be together? However long it is, I know it will be k-razy! Good times of laughing, chatting, decorating, and giggling are sure to ensue.

So yes, there are my history of roomies. There have been good times. I miss the past, but I am excited for the future. Who knows who my next roomie will be?

I want me some girl awesomeness

ALL I want to do is watch BBC's 5 hour version of Pride and Prejudice. But the DVD the library so graciously let me check out is SCRATCHED and will not play. All I want to do is watch Pride and Prejudice. But I can't. argh.

Coming Through

He came through for me. As always. Before I even asked for it. He knew. But of course he knew...he knows everything about me. He knows more about me than I know about myself. It's crazy to think about but absolutely wonderful all at the same time. He knew what I needed, and he provided for me. All I had to do was take the time and listen. Then this morning, I met him again on my bike ride to work. Beautiful morning. I started singing to him. About the skies, and the early morning dew, and the trees, and the sun. I swerved my bike back and forth across the pavement and sang to the heavens. He always comes through for me. Even though I don't deserve it. I just need to take time for him.

(p.s. Yes, Steven, this is about Jesus.)

Bad Mood

I've been cranky lately.
I've been moody. I've been downright depressed.
Maybe you didn't know that. Maybe you didn't even notice...except I've made it pretty obvious. That's why I've needed you around more. That's why I've been silent when you call me to say you're staying longer, you need more time, you're busy, tired. That's why I've shut my mouth and scowled when things haven't gone the way I wanted them to. It's why I've yelled and grumbled.
It's why I've tried hard to make special time for us.
Because I'm lonely. And I've needed you.
It's why I've dressed up, put makeup on, tried to smell good, cooked. Just to be around you. Just to have some special time with you after all of the stress of schoolwork is done.
Don't tell me we have all summer.
I know we have all summer.
But right now is when I need you. There will be a time soon when I will be fine with you not being around for a little while. Fine when you want to hang out with someone else. Fine when you have to sleep. I won't bother you with sighs and silence when you can't be around. I know I'm being selfish. I don't like it. But I've just...needed you.
That's why I've been cranky.

And that's why I need you to remind me of the only one who can never make me feel lonely. ever.